MINE

After I hit my handsparing last night tonight is mine!!! It belongs to me! I will own my stunts and when my group dances I will be the ONLY one they pay attention to. I'm working it. I AM a Marshall cheerleader and there isn't anyone who can take this away from me!

Time to Shine

Tonight is the first night of tryouts. I've spent much of the day just hanging out and relaxing and and I have been going between worried and excited. Today is my time to shine! It's my time to prove to everyone that I deserve this and that I have earned this and that I am THE Marshall Cheerleader. Today is simply an opportunity. It is not anything more. Today and tomorrow are nothing more than another weekend. As long as I relax and do my best then the rest is out of my hads and I can feel good knowing that I have done my best. I love cheerleading and I am not going to let nerves get the best of me!!!

Have Fun

My head is so full of craziness right now. I'm so intimidates by try outs and I'm not even there yet. I'm letting the other new girls' insecurities make me insecure. I never fully got over last night but I'm doing much better. Mom "spotted" me in the park today and I did the first (and only) one by myself because I hail Mary'd and hit her in the side of the face. She's fien and I made it over which means that onviously that is the worst thing that can happen! I'm tumbling with Richie tomorrow before tryouts and I think it will be a really good warm up. I think getting my head around my tumbling early will help and that extra hour or so of warm up will definitely put me in first! I'm just working on thinking the best instead of thinking the worst so that I can use this adrenaline to my advantage! I know I can do these requirements! I've done them a billion times! I can do these stunts in my sleep!
Today was a pretty good day. After our walk, mom and I went shopping which really took my mind off things when I got into it. I got 2 books and the most amazing manicure kit. I swear this buffer thing is like Jesus. So tonight I ordered in chinese and did my nails. I was expecting to work out with Richie tonight but he texted me and said tomorrow would be better. Once I thought about that for like 2 seconds I realized how much smarter that was!!!
Tomorrow is going to be a big day but mom reminded me of something I had forgotten about since we left Columbus. Have Fun. What does any of this mean if I'm not having fun. Sure there's going to be stress this weekend but there is no reason to be making myself physically sick to my stomach!! I have worked and prepared and now it is my time to shine. My new life starts tomorrow and I can either jump on the speeding train or be left behind. After getting all of this off my chest I think I'm much more inclined to jump on.

Fight it

All I have to do is believe in myself!!! Tumbling tonight went well. I'm feeling some anxiety about try outs in regards to normal stuff. Just what ifs like any new person not knowing what to expect. I just have to fight these and KNOW that I can do my stuff!!

I'm so going to do this

I'm so ready to go to tumbling tonight! Talking to Dr. kays tonight and having Mom see me stunt really got me excited! They both really helped ease my worries about try outs. I mean really, if everyone else is so confident about me then how can I not be? I totally have this. I know I can do this and I'm GOING TO DO THIS!!!

A good but frustrating night

URGGGHH!!!! Mike looked at me tonight after I did my handspring ont 2 floors on top of the pit and pointed to the floor and said handspring and I totally let the opportunity pass me by. I didn't do it. He had to stand there. I played to many games with myself. It's ok though. Mike knows it's right there and I know it too. It's just soooo frustrating cutting it so close and not knowing what's going to happen. Tonight isn't as important as tomorrow. I have to concentrate on pushing forward! It doesn't matter that I didn't throw it tonight. What matters is that Mike's goal was for me to do pretty handsprings on the 1 floor on the soft mat and not only did I do that but I did it on 2 floors and then he told me to do it on the regular floor. I wayyy surpassed my goal even if I didn't do it on the floor without him having to stand there. I want to do it tomorrow night and I want to do it consistently by friday. What matters is that I do it 11 days from now. Tonight is done and now I just move forward

11 days

Try outs are in 11 days. I'm definitely feeling some anxiety. I'm tumbling everyday this week. I just feel like I want all of this work to be worth it and I'm feeling frustrated and stressed. I'm definitely excited and I have SO MUCH support!! I'm only afraid of failin and I know that I've technically already succeeded but I want to be cheering next year so badly! Tonight I'm just going to forget about all the stress and frustration and concentrate on doing what I need to do. I'm going to do my handspring tonight!!

twice

I DID IT!!!! I did my handspring twice tonight and I'm doing it on Saturday! I just got off the phone with steph and she said that if I throw it I'm pretty much guaranteed a spot. Oh MY GOODNESS!!!! I could shoot through the roof right now. I feel SOOOOOO good!!! I feel like the little engine that could!